Since I was a child everything around me has taught me that certain milestones need to be reached by a certain age. This is especially true for women. Raise your hand if you had an aunt ask you when you're getting married, or if someone has rudely pointed out your "biological clock ticking." We've all been there. Society has this idea of norms as to when life's milestones should happen.
Well, guess what? Sometimes the universe has different plans, and honestly most times, if not all the time, it works out for the better. I'm proof of this. Nothing in my timeline went the way I expected it to, but in one way or another it all worked out for the better.
Let me explain...
WHAT I THOUGHT MY TIMELINE WOULD BE: MARRIED AT 24
WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED: MARRIED AT 27
I went through a really, really, really bad breakup at 24. What happened next? I gave myself a year of yes, went on the craziest adventures because of it, and ended up being a straight shooter who doesn't take BS from anyone... which turns out, left quite the first impression on my now husband who just so happens to possess every quality I need in a life partner.
WHAT I THOUGHT MY TIMELINE WOULD BE: HOMEOWNER 24
(after I got married of course)
WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED: HOMEOWNER 25 (and single)
I always thought my first home would be purchased with my life partner. I have my parents to thank for this one. They convinced me to take my earnings and purchase an investment property ON MY OWN. This set me up for financial success. Plus I learned the importance of being financially independent and having my own investments, which is one of the most empowering feelings.
WHAT I THOUGHT MY TIMELINE WOULD BE: RUNNING MY OWN BUSINESS 25
WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED: RUNNING MY OWN BUSINESS 29
I wanted to run my own business straight out of university, then as a compromise to myself, I thought 25 sounded more ideal. A few years in the corporate world and then I'll dive in.
I had a freelance side-gig that focused on creating bespoke invitations and wedding stationery. I fell into this gig by chance. It was fun, but never my passion. I wasn't in it 100%, but I knew I wanted to run my own business. I kept pushing myself only to go around in circles.
At the same time, I was climbing the corporate ladder. The good, the bad and the ugly taught me so much here. I expanded my network and credentials all while learning what kind of boss I didn't want to be (thank you toxic work environment).
My side-hustle taught me more about what I wanted and didn't want. It wasn't until my late 20s that I realized my passion for working with small businesses and entrepreneurs. After that, I started to pull every business relationship I had created over the years to build what would be Roop Creative Agency.
WHAT I THOUGHT MY TIMELINE WOULD BE: FIRST BABY AT 30
WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED: FIRST BABY AT 34
Well, I did get pregnant at 30 but it turned out to be an ecotopic that led me to emergency surgery. I was devastated and it took me a while to deal with those feelings. Although the hurt of a miscarriage will never leave me, this was the beginning of a new chapter in my life. I took the time to learn and unlearn more about myself, my mind and my body, make changes and become an advocate. I became more secure, mentally, physically and financially. Without that loss, I wouldn't be who I am today. I believe I'll always wonder what if... but I also know that moment lead me down a journey to make myself more whole, for which I'm forever grateful for.
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So next time you fall off your timeline, just know something better is out there, stop and think about what lessons you can take away from this, trust me, it helps process and gives you the power to become who you're meant to be.